Giving them the resources in their space, so they don’t have to involve you if they’re scared to is such a good idea for any parent of teens. Same with the journal and emergency emoji code. It’s even more important for foster kids who are definitionally going through something difficult, but adolescence is really hard for a lot of kids anyways. So, those are just great ideas, in general!
I'm wanting to write a (fiction) YA novel that involves teen(s) going into foster care, and I've been following your channel for a long time now and I can't tell you how helpful these videos are! Obviously I plan on interviewing someone if I'm able to for specific situational questions and scenarios, along with endless research, but the general stuff you showcase and act out is unbelievably informative! I see how many other foster parents/families your channel helps as well, so I really hope you know just how much good you're doing!! Thank you for spreading awareness on foster care and sharing your amazing insight and tips on how to help kids when they need it most!!
If only every single parent had to go through the screening and training that foster parents do. To all the good faster parents out there, thank you for what you do.
Please keep making these important videos. Lots of people mean well as they connect with children and youth in foster care but just dont have enough awareness what they may innocently say or do could make things worse or uncomfortable. Bless you and your important work.
I don't know why but these videos are so soothing. I have great parents but I've learnt that unfortunately that’s actually not all that common. It just gives me hope for tne kids that are in this difficult situation, that someone cares for them like this. I wish there were more people like this.
Could you by chance do a video about what it would be like if you had a age regressor in your foster home and what that may look like? I'm a regressor who is in the process of my own case, I won't end up in a home but it feels good to have understanding.
Always have resources and the crisis number in their room! A friend of mine was in foster care and suicidal. He ended up hospitalized before overdosing. He felt uncomfortable getting resources and numbers from his foster parents. No kid should ever go through that.
Giving the kid those resources is good because honestly, they don't know if they can trust you. This helps build trust, while giving a kid a safety net that'll last long after they leave your home.
How many of us would’ve thrived having a Mother like this…so supportive and loving! My Mom was the last person in the world I would say anything to…my Dad was attentive and loving but he had a very demanding job in the space industry and he could not devote much time to us. Quality vs quantity really doesn’t cut it in my humble opinion but someone had to support the family
Terrific advice. Wish all parents could benefit from these tips. If they all had acess to this kind of training, there could be far less need for Foster services.
I had a code word type system with my mom when I was in the middle of depression, we’d use the cloud emojis so ☀️🌤️☁️🌧️⛈️, to symbolise what I was feeling or needing, as I had a hard time communicating my feelings
One of my best friends in middle school was constantly going through the foster system. He was abused, neglected, or didn't have specific needs met by otherwise well-meaning foster families. I wonder how his situation would've improved if the foster + adoptive families he lived with had access to the information you share
This is great. I work at a mental health hotline, and telling children (foster- or otherwise) they can talk to someone else if they need to, is a great way to build trust. The written communication is also a great one, it's often a strategy we decide on with youth when we encourage them to go talk to a trusted adult in their life; writing is often easier when talking about certain struggles, and offering them this tool in advance is great way to empower them.
Meanwhile, when I was younger, I sometimes used to leave out my "diary" hoping my mom would find it 😉
Also consider if there are factors in the teen's mental health that you may not be super familiar with- race, religion, sexuality, gender, etc. There are resources to help you learn how to support a teen struggling with something like that, or you can find them outside support.
The code word is so good. I have done that with my bio kids, but I think I forgot to mention that code that we all set up two kids ago. We all need a safe place to fall and a code word to use so that we are not the bad guys. Everyone needs an out to a bad situation and I am happy to be the parent who has to be the bad guy and say, “you have to come home now!”❤ that works for mental health as well as being in positions where you realize that the people you thought you could trust are not trustworthy. Kids need to have something to blame on not being cool enough to hang for the whole party. I’m happy to be the bad guy if it means my kids stay safe.❤
Make sure the purpose of the communication journal is clear. When I was going through a rough time (20, had to drop out of college, moved back into my parents house) I started a diary and to my horror, my parents thought it was a "communication method" and read it for months without me knowing. In the video it is very clear, I just never want anyone to experience what I did. 💔
Thank you for phrasing it as "-or a friend" it takes some of the possibly implied "blame" out of the sentence. Sometimes kids and teenagers get defensive if you bring up mental/emotional struggles and will insist they don't need help.
Oh I FELT the journal thing. Even now at 21 I prefer to communicate w/ writing esp if I'm extremely upset. I am so glad you give kids that option, guh (not in foster care, never was, but still realllyyy appreciated :])
Why is the journal thing relatable? Sometimes I feel uncomfortable talking out loud about my issues and texting or writing in a journal really helps me.
Great job giving them resources! We don’t foster but keep local emergency numbers and crisis posted at our house. It helps to know who to call in an emergency.
Omg! I love mental health first aid. In my first class I confused my partner when I answered yes to "have you thought about suicide recently?" But it was such good practice.
39 Comments
Giving them the resources in their space, so they don’t have to involve you if they’re scared to is such a good idea for any parent of teens. Same with the journal and emergency emoji code. It’s even more important for foster kids who are definitionally going through something difficult, but adolescence is really hard for a lot of kids anyways. So, those are just great ideas, in general!
Thank you so much for continuously making these videos!! All the techniques you mention are being remembered for my future kiddos—bio or not :))
I'm wanting to write a (fiction) YA novel that involves teen(s) going into foster care, and I've been following your channel for a long time now and I can't tell you how helpful these videos are! Obviously I plan on interviewing someone if I'm able to for specific situational questions and scenarios, along with endless research, but the general stuff you showcase and act out is unbelievably informative! I see how many other foster parents/families your channel helps as well, so I really hope you know just how much good you're doing!! Thank you for spreading awareness on foster care and sharing your amazing insight and tips on how to help kids when they need it most!!
❤❤❤
TY
This is all so wonderful and helpful thank you Laura ❤. Can anyone tell me what “wrap-around in home support services” looks like?
Thank you so much. You always have great ideas! I would love this so much and I am definitely going to try this when I will have kids some day! ❤
Mental health first aid, a new phrase for me, awesome❤❤❤❤
If only every single parent had to go through the screening and training that foster parents do. To all the good faster parents out there, thank you for what you do.
Please keep making these important videos. Lots of people mean well as they connect with children and youth in foster care but just dont have enough awareness what they may innocently say or do could make things worse or uncomfortable. Bless you and your important work.
What a thoughtful way to take the pressure off something that can feel so deeply overwhelming.
Love your shirt!
I don't know why but these videos are so soothing. I have great parents but I've learnt that unfortunately that’s actually not all that common. It just gives me hope for tne kids that are in this difficult situation, that someone cares for them like this. I wish there were more people like this.
You are so awesome ❤ God Bless You ❤
Could you by chance do a video about what it would be like if you had a age regressor in your foster home and what that may look like? I'm a regressor who is in the process of my own case, I won't end up in a home but it feels good to have understanding.
Biological families can use a lot of these tips too. I love these videos. ❤
I wish, like every time i see your videos, that all these resources and caring people who study how to communicate…for everyone.
Always have resources and the crisis number in their room! A friend of mine was in foster care and suicidal. He ended up hospitalized before overdosing. He felt uncomfortable getting resources and numbers from his foster parents. No kid should ever go through that.
Giving the kid those resources is good because honestly, they don't know if they can trust you. This helps build trust, while giving a kid a safety net that'll last long after they leave your home.
How many of us would’ve thrived having a Mother like this…so supportive and loving! My Mom was the last person in the world I would say anything to…my Dad was attentive and loving but he had a very demanding job in the space industry and he could not devote much time to us. Quality vs quantity really doesn’t cut it in my humble opinion but someone had to support the family
Terrific advice. Wish all parents could benefit from these tips. If they all had acess to this kind of training, there could be far less need for Foster services.
Thank you!
I had a code word type system with my mom when I was in the middle of depression, we’d use the cloud emojis so ☀️🌤️☁️🌧️⛈️, to symbolise what I was feeling or needing, as I had a hard time communicating my feelings
One of my best friends in middle school was constantly going through the foster system. He was abused, neglected, or didn't have specific needs met by otherwise well-meaning foster families. I wonder how his situation would've improved if the foster + adoptive families he lived with had access to the information you share
This is great. I work at a mental health hotline, and telling children (foster- or otherwise) they can talk to someone else if they need to, is a great way to build trust. The written communication is also a great one, it's often a strategy we decide on with youth when we encourage them to go talk to a trusted adult in their life; writing is often easier when talking about certain struggles, and offering them this tool in advance is great way to empower them.
Meanwhile, when I was younger, I sometimes used to leave out my "diary" hoping my mom would find it 😉
Off-topic but SHARK SHIRT!!! I. LOVE. SHARKS.
But yeah I love this video, I would have loved to have had you as my foster parent.
❤❤❤
This is beautiful. Foster teens need support and this is what we all should do ❤️❤️❤️
Also consider if there are factors in the teen's mental health that you may not be super familiar with- race, religion, sexuality, gender, etc. There are resources to help you learn how to support a teen struggling with something like that, or you can find them outside support.
The shirt is so cool 😀
Can you maybe do a skit about a child/teenager in foster care who is self harming/thinking of suicide?
The code word is so good. I have done that with my bio kids, but I think I forgot to mention that code that we all set up two kids ago. We all need a safe place to fall and a code word to use so that we are not the bad guys. Everyone needs an out to a bad situation and I am happy to be the parent who has to be the bad guy and say, “you have to come home now!”❤ that works for mental health as well as being in positions where you realize that the people you thought you could trust are not trustworthy. Kids need to have something to blame on not being cool enough to hang for the whole party. I’m happy to be the bad guy if it means my kids stay safe.❤
Make sure the purpose of the communication journal is clear. When I was going through a rough time (20, had to drop out of college, moved back into my parents house) I started a diary and to my horror, my parents thought it was a "communication method" and read it for months without me knowing. In the video it is very clear, I just never want anyone to experience what I did. 💔
Thank you for phrasing it as "-or a friend" it takes some of the possibly implied "blame" out of the sentence. Sometimes kids and teenagers get defensive if you bring up mental/emotional struggles and will insist they don't need help.
Oh I FELT the journal thing. Even now at 21 I prefer to communicate w/ writing esp if I'm extremely upset. I am so glad you give kids that option, guh (not in foster care, never was, but still realllyyy appreciated :])
Why is the journal thing relatable? Sometimes I feel uncomfortable talking out loud about my issues and texting or writing in a journal really helps me.
Great job giving them resources! We don’t foster but keep local emergency numbers and crisis posted at our house. It helps to know who to call in an emergency.
Perfect 💎
Omg! I love mental health first aid. In my first class I confused my partner when I answered yes to "have you thought about suicide recently?" But it was such good practice.