“At any age, it’s important to keep growing. Trying something new is proven to expand your neural pathways, which helps you stay mentally sharp,” Smerling says. “While it may feel daunting, the benefits to your mental and emotional well-being can be a great motivator. Learning helps to keep you young.”
Meet the experts: Kathryn Smerling, Ph.D., L.C.S.W., a psychotherapist and the author of Learning to Play Again: Rediscovering Our Early Selves to Become Better Adults; Victoria Lashua, a certified life coach and fitness instructor at Cal-a-Vie Health Spa in Vista, CA
Novelty also encourages your brain to release dopamine, a feel-good chemical that naturally dips as we age (roughly 10% per decade through adult life). Plus, research shows that adding variety to one’s routine is linked to greater feelings of positivity—and who couldn’t use a brain boost with a side of extra joy? Follow these steps to try something new and take the plunge into a new adventure.
1. ID your fear.
Lack of confidence and fear are common roadblocks that keep us from trying new things, says Victoria Lashua, a certified life coach and fitness instructor at Cal-a-Vie Health Spa in Vista, CA. The key to confronting these emotional obstacles, she says, is to acknowledge them. Say you really want to try a cooking class, but you’re hesitant. Try what Lashua encourages her clients to do: Write down your fears and say them out loud (for instance, “I’m nervous I’ll embarrass myself”). Follow that with a positive affirmation such as “I’m not going to let fear stop me”—say it until you begin to believe it, even if just a little bit.
“Identifying your fear is an essential first step in taking control of it and eventually letting it go,” says Lashua. “When you verbalize it or write it down, that helps break the negative spiral.” It may also show you that you’re being hard on yourself, as well as help you accept the fact that mistakes are not only expected when you’re a beginner but an essential part of the process.
2. Embrace your newbie status.
Ever been secretly jealous of someone who’s just starting an activity you love, or excited for them because you know how much they’re going to get out of it? That “first-time” feeling is unrivaled, and now is your opportunity to embrace it.
“Everyone starts out as a newbie, so know that you’re not unique. Whatever you’re doing, you may be surrounded by other nervous first-timers as well as people who know the ropes,” says Smerling. “The best way to dissolve your self-consciousness is to let your guard down and tell someone you’re new.” The benefits go both ways when you do that: “People love to share their passions,” says Smerling, “so they’ll jump at the chance to help. You may even make their day.”
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3. Start small.
To get yourself going, set a daily, weekly, or monthly goal—and make it an achievable one. “When you set a super-lofty goal, you’ll likely burn out before you even begin,” says Lashua. For instance, if you’ve been wanting to take a dance class but you feel self-conscious about dancing in public, start with a class on YouTube, then invite a supportive pal over to do it with you. Checking manageable goals off your list builds confidence and momentum, making you more likely to finally do the thing you want to do and stick with it.
Another smart trick: Incentivize yourself to follow through, says Lashua. Whether you buy a new dance outfit or grab a sweet treat after your class, rewarding yourself helps train your brain to associate positive things with the activity.
And if you don’t enjoy yourself when you first try something, give it another shot before writing the activity off. “Sometimes it’s just hard to relax at first. You might surprise yourself next time,” says Lashua. “Also, leave the illusion of perfection at the door. No one’s perfect, especially not as a newbie.”
4. Lean on community.
Developing a solid support system is key, which could involve enlisting a friend to accompany you or finding a community of people who are already doing the activity (or trying both). “Whether you’re sharing a new experience with an old pal or creating a bond with someone you’ve just met, everything is more fun with a friend,” says Smerling. “Plus, if you’re feeling tense, bringing a companion can help you stay lighthearted and look for the joy.”
On a practical level, you’re also more likely to show up if you’ve made a date with another person; keeping your plans can seem more important when someone is counting on you.
5. Fake it ’til you make it.
There are times when you just have to do the thing and wait for feeling at ease to follow. Remember, you’re not aiming to be the best in the world at what you are trying: Maybe “making it” just means you’ve got the basics down. “You won’t always feel motivated to try something new, but do it anyway,” says Smerling. “You may have to convince yourself on tough days, but it’s worth it. Trust me, you’ll always be happy you pushed yourself out the door.”
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