DEAR ABBY: As my parents have aged, my father has been misremembering things or making wrong assumptions. It has increasingly gotten on my mom’s nerves (she has also become more impatient and snappy lately), and she has been yelling at him in response. Sometimes, he responds back, but usually he doesn’t.
My sister snapped at them, saying she is tired of their bickering, so they don’t do that around her as often anymore. But anytime I have gotten upset about it or tried to suggest to them how to resolve things, Mom gets upset with me. My mental health isn’t the best right now, so continuing to do that doesn’t seem like a good idea, but I’m at a loss about what to do. Any thoughts? — UNCERTAIN IN IOWA
DEAR UNCERTAIN: Before this situation grows worse, please understand that it may be necessary for both of your parents to have physical and neurological examinations. If you can arrange for that, PLEASE do. The changes you describe in your father may be signs of dementia, and your mother may be stressed to the point that she can no longer deal with him without losing it.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.