When you go through something firsthand, it can totally change the way you view things, for better or worse. I recently stumbled across a Reddit thread where people shared the kinds of pain you can’t truly understand until you experience it yourself. Here are the most eye-opening responses:

Note: This post contains mentions of mental illness and pregnancy loss.

1. “The pain of watching your child experience pain, and not being able to help.”Two people sitting closely, one appears to be comforting the other by holding their hands

Chaytee / Getty Images

u/Eppshome

2. “Betrayal, and more, when people around you knew about something, and you didn’t. Later, to find out you were the only idiot in the plotline.”

u/Leading-Ear6312

3. “Depression. I would rather break every bone in my body than relive the period of time I was at my lowest mentally and emotionally.”

u/Ashie_xo82

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4. “Migraines. I know some people who think it’s just a bad headache.”A person on the sofa with their eyes closed

Maria Korneeva / Getty Images

u/Stephburger78

5. “Death of a loved one.”

u/wood-fired-stove

6. “Endometriosis. No, it’s not just a bad period.”

u/RinnelSpinel

7. “Losing a pet. 😢”Fluffy white dog looking up at the camera with an inquisitive expression, standing on wooden floorboards

Raquel Artero / Getty Images

u/TakingMyPowerBack444

8. “Infertility. IVF and other fertility treatment (physically, mentally, emotionally), especially when it is unsuccessful. Pregnancy loss. Miscarriage.”

u/knottoday__

9. “Caring for a loved one with dementia.”

u/RedheadBanshee

10. “The day after you break a bone. The initial break doesn’t hurt after a bit because it goes all numb, but that night/the next day, sheeeesh, you’re gonna feel it.”A person's foot in a decorative cast with floral designs rests on a wooden table

Richard Drury / Getty Images

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u/BandStandard4257

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11. “Absence of support during a tough time.”

u/azorianmilk

12. “IUD insertion.”

u/Early_Goose11595

13. “Grief.”A person sitting in a dimly lit room with their hands covering their face

Kseniya Ovchinnikova / Getty Images

u/Silver-Wren

14. “Being stalked.”

u/NowYouRunningScared

15. “I once thought I’d lost my child in a busy public space. For about five minutes, I was in hell. I wouldn’t wish losing a child on my worst enemy.”

u/Confident_Bee1447

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16. “Childbirth.”A person gently holding their pregnant belly in a relaxed living room setting

Urbazon / Getty Images

u/Ynot2_day

17. “Postpartum depression.”

u/No_Package3942

18. “Addiction.”

u/necessarypretzel

19. “Menstrual cramps. Severity depends on individual experience, but I’ve given birth, and my worst cramps were as bad as some of my contractions.”A person lying on a couch, wearing a cozy sweater, hands covering their face

Ingwervanille / Getty Images

u/Impressive_Let3046

20. “Unrequited love.”

u/MeGaManMaDeMe

21. “Plantar fasciitis, which then gives anxiety in anticipation of every step.”

u/HappilyRetiredGuy

22. “Arthritis. All day, every day.”A person wearing a white shirt, touching their hands, adorned with rings

Simpleimages / Getty Images

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u/Electronic_Many_7721

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23. “Panic attacks. They sound so basic and trite, like OK, sure, calm down. But I wouldn’t wish them on my worst enemy. Pure torture.”

u/shimmrbitch

24. “Schizophrenia. It’s romanticizing madness in pop culture; the reality is terrifying.”

u/CommercialMechanic36

25. “Real, genuine heartbreak. The kind where you are taking painkillers for any relief in your chest.”A person sitting on a windowsill, covering their face with their hand, and looking out at a cityscape

Mementojpeg / Getty Images

u/Human_Situation_2641

26. “Hitting your limits quietly and still being expected to function like nothing’s wrong.”

u/drummonkey2010

27. And finally, “Chronic pain. Nothing grinds you down as a person quite like dealing with constant pain, day in, day out, knowing that there is no end in sight and likely never will be. People who haven’t experienced this kind of pain have no idea.”

u/ExcellentLettuce4

What kind of pain do people underestimate? Share your story in the comments, or submit anonymously using the form below. Your response might be featured in an upcoming BuzzFeed Community post!

Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.

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