Is This the Missing Key for Mental Health?
Research shows even small acts of service — helping a neighbor, volunteering, giving your time — can lift depression and increase well-being. Not because it’s comfortable, but because it’s purposeful.
Purpose over Comfort. Every time.
When we live with purpose, our struggles don’t just vanish — they transform. Discomfort becomes meaning, and meaning creates joy.
What’s one small act of service you could do this week?
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Therapy in a Nutshell and the information provided by Emma McAdam are solely intended for informational and entertainment purposes and are not a substitute for advice, diagnosis, or treatment regarding medical or mental health conditions. Although Emma McAdam is a licensed marriage and family therapist, the views expressed on this site or any related content should not be taken for medical or psychiatric advice. Always consult your physician before making any decisions related to your physical or mental health.
In therapy I use a combination of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Systems Theory, positive psychology, and a bio-psycho-social approach to treating mental illness and other challenges we all face in life. The ideas from my videos are frequently adapted from multiple sources. Many of them come from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, especially the work of Steven Hayes, Jason Luoma, and Russ Harris. The sections on stress and the mind-body connection derive from the work of Stephen Porges (the Polyvagal theory), Peter Levine (Somatic Experiencing) Francine Shapiro (EMDR), and Bessel Van Der Kolk. I also rely heavily on the work of the Arbinger institute for my overall understanding of our ability to choose our life’s direction.
And deeper than all of that, the Gospel of Jesus Christ orients my personal worldview and sense of security, peace, hope, and love https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/c…
If you are in crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ or 988 or your local emergency services.
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29 Comments
Jesus was the missing key for me 😊
Yes ‼️💜
So true
Yeah. It's called people pleaser Syndrom. All the depressive people Out their Love serving Others. Up To their own Doom
i feel like this might be one of the reasons why mental health has declined so drastically. people and society has become very individualistic and self-centered, to a fault. of course being a bit more selfish can be good for people who are people pleasers
❤Yep! Completely agree!
Do a video on this topic
Loads of love your way! ❤ thank you
This is profound and I'm going to write it down: "When we have purpose it metabolizes discomfort into joy!"
💯 💯 💯
May Allah bless you for your good works.
You are so right!
I think it really depends on the person and the situation. We need to want to do the service and truly feel like it's something meaningful. Otherwise, if it's forced or if we only feel valuable when we serve others, and not when we do something for ourselves, it can be unhealthy as well. Some people, especially women, almost always serve others and don't even respect their own needs, wishes and boundaries. It can be very draining for such people and just lead to more burnout, frustration and depression.
Can't disagree! It does feel good to have purpose
It’s been part of Maslow hierarchy of needs for quite some time
Of course therapy is self-focused. There is NOONE else in your head other than you. When you stabilize the inner storm you can bring your light to others unconditionally. But that's just my opinion.
❤so true. It's God's Design
Sometimes just kindness can make a difference. I have a friend who is going through some really hard things. I cannot fix it, but I could make sure she had coffee today. I'm not feeling well myself and getting her coffee helped me feel better. I'm honestly not sure if how I feel is a body problem or a brain problem, so I'm trying to treat it as both.
Don't talk about mental health while remaining silent about the genocide and starvation taking place in Gaza. Don't be a hypocrite or a Zionist.
Where have you been? Early 2000 this came out. At a time I was helping people a lot, I got to hear that the reason for depression is selfishness and if I would just help people more I would be happy. Of course it feels good to do good, when you can. Of course it helps your body to exercise, when you can. And it's never wrong to encourage people to do good. But the down side to depression isn't just my own shame but feeling like everyone else is judging me. That is and has been for the last 25 years the blame to people with depression is it's caused by selfishness. I've heard it from the pol-pet many times and it really makes it hard to go to church. I'm not well enough to make commitments and/or have resources/ability to help much these days. When I do get feeling better, I hope that the good I do is out of a sincere loving heart for God & people and NOT the selfish need to feel better and not be unfavorably judged. Remain in the Vine, He will get me through this, that's my strategy.
Thanks to your videos i could recently discover and digest shame. It was very hard for me in the past to find purpose. But suddenly as you now mention it i feel better about it. I wonder if shame, guilt, blame and regret hinder having a purpose. So if someone wants to find purpose digest and let go of these. And i can put that in my tool, theory and experience box. 🤗
Yes I have had this recommended to me many times by many therapists. This is not a secret. The real "missing key" is if you can not get out of bed then volunteering at a food bank IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN…. so it doesn't matter how great 'service' is for mental health if it is never going to happen.
– hissing in ex jehovah's witness –
Girlie, You have the best smile 😁 I can be sad AF and still smile when I see you ‼️ thankyou
So my depression would be worse if I wasn't working in a field of service?
There is more joy in giving than receiving.
I agree and would add that you can marry the two by SERVING your SELF (in positive, non-harmful ways ie self-care).
For example, my mood is elevated 10X within minutes when I serve myself the "treat" of putting on one of my dance playlists which I made for myself AND to share with whomever bumps into them and appreciates them as well. I can take it a step further by doing live streams of my dance parties for others or even by providing music for events if anyone wants.
Absolutely. I so believe this, but never given a chance to be of service even for myself and it sucks, sucks, sucks. Nobody has ever wanted and put me on my knees, for even trying! OMG! What a crazy life I've had!
I’ve said this over and over again. Serving is the most selfish thing you can do because of how good it makes you feel. Obviously, it’s not selfish, but the reward for your own self when helping others is so immense.
Service is good