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These 7 simple habits are utterly destroying your mental health



These 7 simple habits are utterly destroying your mental health

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Most people are following lifestyles that are quietly destroying their mental health. In this video, I break down 7 deeply “normal” habits that I believe are making people more depressed, isolated, anxious, exhausted, and emotionally disconnected from their own lives.

I talk about self-neglect, isolation, overspending, overconsumption, excessive screen time, and why living in fantasy worlds can slowly disconnect you from reality without you even noticing it.

My core message is simple: if “normal” keeps producing misery, maybe the goal shouldn’t be normal anymore.

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About me:
I know what it is to feel hopelessly stuck and worthless to the world in general. I also know what it is to live without those feelings. I’m both a Clinical Psychology specializing in treatment-resistant depression and anxiety, and a human who has spent more than a decade managing sever depression and anxiety.

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Disclaimer: This content is not intended to be a replacement for receiving treatment. It is purely educational in nature. My relationship with you is that of presenter and audience, not therapist and client.

But I do care.

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41 Comments

  3. @Nenad_Soza on

    Glad to hear somebody mentioning living in a fantasy world. I had a problem detaching from the physical world and living in one I imagined in my head. Not the topic that is mentioned too often.

  4. @HeyArnoldpåsvenska on

    "Excessive investment in fantasy worlds" = Escapism is mental diversion from unpleasant aspects of daily life, typically through activities involving imagination or entertainment.

  6. @pwalk4160 on

    I get it that you need to make money, but the product placement really lowered the value of this video for me. In fact, I couldn't finish it.

  7. @Kevin-tg4lv on

    Life ALWAYS break people who are emotionally weak (empaths, bleeding hearts), but for the cold blooded ones this world is a real playground full of fun and games, emotions are weaknesses, either good or bad, love or anger, both sides of the same coin, life back then was a nightmare even for powerful people, Alexander the Great died of disease after killing hundreds, he was strong, Caesar was betrayed by weak men and got stabbed to death, another strong dude, talk about modern times.

  8. @check-intoday on

    If you are reading this and you are struggling with mental health… you can share how you truly feel to Check-In Today to get it off your mind, read what others are going through to realize you're not alone, and talk to people who feel the same there. it is available on android and iphone.

  9. @danieloleary1067 on

    I'm 77 true..I have no one..no friends, no acquaintances, no relatives. Im am lonely isolated and depressed. How do I meet people? I don't use alcohol, I don't know where to go to make friends

  10. @Gardarik33115 on

    That all assumes there is any point to it and quality of life is inherently valuable, which is not the case in the sense of "inherently". Funny how you mention fantasy worlds, because I think there is a reason people escape to them – just look outside and touch the grass full of microplastics, or even more alluring – go outside with the raging sirens of bomb alerts. The "spurious correlation" is not the term; "inverse correlation" is.

  11. @septemberamyx on

    I'm sorry, foreign forces are taking us down and there's no way to stop it unless we start depending on each other again. NO ELECTRONICS AT ALL.

  12. @rosehalpin1976 on

    I can SO identify with the verbal abuse to oneself. Until recently, if I was pissed off with myself for some reason, I'd curse myself out in a far more aggressive way than I'd ever dream of speaking to even my worst enemy. Then I read something about how your brain can take it all to heart and such negativity can have a seriously detrimental effect on your mental wellbeing so I've been making an effort to be kinder to myself. Now, if I do something stupid or make a mistake I just tell myself lightly, "Well aren't you a silly sausage" or something equally benign; I really do think it's making a difference to how I feel.

  15. @julieschafer2991 on

    I cant have relations, im lonely, i simply put myself out there at all. How i feel i cant talk about. I am making myself isolated. I cant fix it. I am getting to where i just dont care but i cant make myself fix it.

  16. @Ohxinessaxinessa on

    I adore you, Dr. Scott. I’m so devoid of friends, acquaintances and relatives that there are times I’ve literally crashed AA or NA meetings JUST to be around other humans (and I don’t have a substance use disorder so I can’t in good conscience ask for a sponsor. But tbh I want a sponsor so I can maybe make a best friend but then I’d have to lie and I absolutely can’t keep that up).
    Good stuff, Sir.
    Thank you, as always, for getting it.

  17. @dazwischen5072 on

    About screentime:
    So like many people, I often use social media, scrolling, or watching YouTube videos to procrastinate because I don’t want to “DO THE THING.” Or my brain simply won’t let me. (I have ADHD.)

    But today I noticed something interesting.
    I spent the whole day not “doing the thing” I was supposed to do, which has to do with finances. (I’m rubbish at financial stuff.)
    Instead, I got on my bike and went into the forest for a walk and disappeared for two hours, even though I had only planned to go and get some bread. 🌳🚴‍♂️

    Then I thought I should tidy up before starting the financial thing. “15 minutes,” I thought. Instead, I cleaned the flat for two and a half hours.🙈🤓

    After that, I was finally supposed to “do the thing.” But then I exercised for one hour instead.🏋️‍♀️🤸‍♀️🧘🏾‍♂️💃🏻

    So yes, I spent almost five hours NOT DOING THE THING! And then I was too tired to do it! 😂🤯🤓

    But none of it was doomscrolling or lying on the sofa. I was actually doing good things. Healthy things. Useful things.
    And still, here I am at the end of the day, and I still have not done the thing. And of course I’m frustrated about that.

    Could you maybe do a video about “doing the thing”? Because as an ADHDer, this is honestly one of my absolute main problems. I spend my days doing a lot of stuff, just not doing what I am supposed to do….😶‍🌫️

  18. @lolleonlolable on

    the world we life in is kinda lost, im pretty sure most intelligent guys/girls that think about more than the "usualy stuff" can see that. idk everyday your hear somehting about war/death/rape/mass layoffs/fear of ww3.. you name it .. like you kinda have to be a psycho to listen to all this and feeling good about yourself or the world .. we life in a world were some ppl just kill others for fun.. rape .. torture them .. sell them .. there is so much really really bad fucked up stuff happening.. some "small" stuff but there is also global stuff .. like the most fucked up stuff is prolly what rich ppl are doing .. the epsteins of this world .. or the nestle companys of this world .. there is so much shit going on if you really start looking. HOW THE FUCK CAN U JUST LIFE A NORMAL HAPPY LIFE LIKE NOTHING IS HAPPENING ?
    idk dude i think "normal" ppl that dont lose it or fall into a depression or somehting are psycopaths without feelings.

  19. @shaimizu on

    It's hard to not be on my phone when I don't have transportation and I'm on social security due to SAD. There is too much time, and I don't know how to fill it apart from hobbies, cleaning, cooking, riding my bike, and speaking with my therapist every week.

  21. @DittersGustav on

    Overconsumption and hoarding absolutely destroys mental health. I accumulated a lot of stuff, from a lot of interests that ended up taking all of my time, free or otherwise. I spent a lot more time just maintaining it than enjoying.

    I'm currently trying to sell a lot of stuff to simplify life.

  22. @societyyouwin9627 on

    Woah! 🤯 I never thought of my constantly addressing my own happiness was a form of self obsession! But it hit like a lightbulb 💡 when you said it! I do feel better when I am serving others, caring for others. That's some good "medicine" right there! Thank you Dr. Scott!

  24. @GilRicardez on

    "Excessive investment in fantasy worlds" = Escapism is mental diversion from unpleasant aspects of daily life, typically through activities involving imagination or entertainment.

  30. @junegagnon6506 on

    Thank-you so very much Dr. Scott!
    It's funny, I don't get get out too often but I try to look out my window to get some sunshine when we get it in our area of BC Canada. I only get out a couple of weeks due to my awful sleep cycle impairment. And it really is so very nice to get out around people. But on the days I look out the window I see mostly people young and old walking with their cellphone in hand looking at it as they are walking. My elderly friend remarked one time that she said people look like zombies that are on their cellphones while they are walking…

  31. @kristakemp2658 on

    The irony is me having both bpd and autism there is stigma against both of these diagnosis and the desire to be in contact or wanting people to prove our inner negative beliefs wrong. You see it all the time even in support groups of people saying shut up and enjoy your own company or saying "nobody can heal those wounds but you" so yes id love to have the opportunity to be socialized enough to have not negative experiences and have those ideas challenged but the outside world whether it be social trends or support groups do not make that easy.

  32. @mikespike2099 on

    That’s for being real Dr Eilers – nice summarized focus points to help those who have neuro-disabilities.
    Tbh fantasy gaming worlds were a MAJOR crutch for life during my adolescence- I don’t think I would be around if not for these worlds. However, I do know as an adult these are not real worlds and they have become more dopamine hit focused!

  33. @rebeccaswafford1107 on

    OK, I had a hard time getting through that. I kind of feel gut punched because I know I’m guilty of at least six of those. And hearing it all at the same time this makes me realize how much needs to change and needs to change quickly and now I just wanna take a Xanax and go to bed, which is not the most healthy thing.

  35. @UrXdaXbasis on

    to your point on consumption and screens. I think a big help for me was turning off all algorithms and suggested channels and blocking all ads. I don't own a tv. I do spend a lot of time on the CPU, in which fantasy can definitely take over and be a problem like you mentioned.

    Be very careful about what you CONSUME on screens and carefully consider what you are subscribing to. Taking it a step further, consider who benefits from feeding you these ads, our generation has been groomed to overconsume, not only their products, but their FANTASY imposed by the SHAME machine. Its impossible to avoid it completely, but pruning your youtube subs of the negativity can make a huge difference.

    I agree the smart phone thing is not just a correlation, we are dividing to far from nature into worlds of fantasy, shame, and isolation while tech companies benefit greatly from this. For me its hard to find a balance, but what helps is having a garden! planting flowers, spending 15 minutes sitting outside watching the robin feed her babies. Its the small things that get lost when I spend all day playing WoW or something.

  36. @Legendary_Heatran on

    I love the gaming examples! I’m also guilty of excessive time spent gaming at times. Side note, I feel overwhelmed just imagining your 500+ game library hahaha.

  37. @TSteffi on

    Dr. Scott, thank you so much.
    When I found your channel, I was so deep down in depression, I couldn't even think of getting better.
    But the small, practical things you teach made all the difference.
    I worked on my inner dialogue, my sleep hygiene. It's been a while.
    But since I've had the energy to rearrange my whole apartment, and next month I can finally buy another closet to put all the clutter away and finally clean up.
    And to think that outwardly, nothing much has changed. I don't work more hours or anything.
    Because I keep all the extra energy I'm getting from the small steps, and put that energy towards improving myself, not wasting it to please other people, who don't even care about me.

    I'm still at the beginning after 2 or more years. But I'm going the right direction, and that's all that matters.
    Thank you

  38. @PatchworkDragon on

    Way to call me out on my "treasure hunting" (thrift shopping) habit. There's a thrill in finding the perfect thing at a great price – but then it turns into clutter.

  39. @brintlollar6648 on

    I think about how brutal we can be, and I have come to believe that these are not our own words.

    I hear Dr. Scott calling himself a “ridiculous human being” over 30 bottles of cologne, and I get this horrid vision of someone calling him a ridiculous human being in an environment he can’t escape.

    I don’t know how real that is. It really could be just me projecting my own trauma.

  40. @genxer1824 on

    21:56 Easier said than done. It is quite easy to arrange things so that I have no opportunity to play games or watch movies, I can block Reddit and YouTube on my computer so I won't waste time on pointless discussions with people I don't know.
    But that is insufficient because telling me not to daydream is like telling an alcoholic not to drink the shot that's already in his hand. It can be done, just not for very long.

  41. @Sizifus on

    Youtube has been the number one isolator for me. After work a lot of times I just drop on the couch and binge watch all kind of vids on Youtube. I've managed to quit instagram, facebook, but Youtube is very difficult to quit, because I've been on it since like 2009. It's been my home on the internet, my main way to cope and spend time. I hope I can drop its use for good