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  1. I have a question, what does it mean when you have depression and anxiety, but also keep trying to think of past times you were happier and that nonstop ? Is it a way of escaping reality ? I often visit childhood places too ,in a way to somehow replay the happy moments I had there. I feel so lost and I hate my today's self so much. I feel worthless. Everything feels like a challenge to me, I am scared to be a burden to my family. My mother told me to just look forward and don't stay stuck into the past ,as if it's easy. "But everyone keeps growing, why not you ?".